Some questions seem easy enough until your asked and you find yourself at a loss for words.One of these hard to answer but profoundly important questions is who is a father?
Is it the man who provides the XY chromosomes for you to be made?
Is it the man who raises you and is there for every milestone of your life?
Is it the man you look up to,want to be like,who provides a blueprint for the kind of man you want to be when you grow up?
Is it the man you envision your husband and father of your children will be like?
This is a personal issue for me and in spite of my daddy issues,i somehow managed to find love and a father for my children who is everything I ever wanted and more.That said,even now as an adult and a mother,some of the ghosts from my past still come calling and it got me thinking…..
Just how seriously do we take the role of a father in a child’s life? and not only during their childhood but until they grow into the man or woman they are meant to be.What happens when they can’t rise above the feeling of rejection your not being in their life creates.
Worse still, how are they supposed to process your seasonal appearance in their life?Do you expect them to adjust their feelings to your comings and goings?Do you think of the son and or daughter who grows up asking themselves questions about why you left?
I realize relationships are difficult and for some couples separation is inevitable,but what does that have to do with raising your children?And ladies unless he poses some form of threat to you or your children,shouldn’t we let our children have a father.
I don’t know if there are answers to my questions or if this is just a useless rant.I just think that we should take the roles we get as parents seriously and realize that our actions or lack there off will one day impact a whole generation.
Children don’t get a say in who their parents will be,its up to you the adult who brought them into this world to step up.You have to make sure you do the best job you can possibly do,regardless of whatever personal issues you’re going through.
Other wise don’t expect to get any credit when they turn into exceptional members of the society but believe me their failures and poor life choices will somehow be attributed to your absence.